You’ve been yarned

I found this photo with the caption: yarn bombing a bus in Mexico City.

My question is this – how does one yarn bomb? You look at that bus and it looks like that took a while to do. The term ‘yarn bombing’ implies a surprise yarn attack. I can’t imagine this kind of things sneaking up on anyone. How do you even get the yarn on there?

If there was such a thing as a surprise yarn attack, would it then need to be premeditated? Maybe they spent months in advance furiously knitting a bus shaped cover such as this one, waiting for the opportune moment to whack it on there and say “Ha! You’ve been yarn bombed!” and then walk away pulling the finger.

I honestly don’t know how this works. I’m am in an endless state of confusion. In other words, life continues as normal.

Please no

I stumbled, unfortunately, upon this tweet today, which has left me in a state of revulsion and shock.

this is why you wear footwear in public pools/gyms/showers: pic.twitter.com/SlRBsCeIse

— David Farrier (@davidfarrier) June 15, 2013

Click on the link at your own risk. For those too afraid to do so, I can only describe it as unpopped corn kernels growing out of somebody’s foot. I’m currently sitting at my computer chanting repeatedly “please let it be photoshopped, please let it be photoshopped, please let it be photoshopped”. I still don’t know if it’s real or not, but I have a horrible, sinking feeling that someone out there may have a creepy growth on their foot like that.

The worst thing is that you can’t help but keep staring at it in horror. It’s like a car crash – you can’t not look.

Honda: the power of dreams

One time I had this media photography class I had to take for my degree, and one of our assignments was to make a photo narrative, so I decided to do one of my brother’s track racing. I went along to one of his track days, where they all zoom around on their motorbikes, make loud noises, look cool, the whole shebang, and I just happened to accidentally take a photo that looks like it should be on an advertisement for Honda.

Frolicking turtles

Here’s a photo my friend took of me joyfully frolicking in a paddock, and somehow slightly resembling a turtle in the head and neck region. I hope this brightens up your day, and fills you, too, with joy.

Listen carefully, I shall say this only once

I have only one thing to say.

Fluffy chickens.

Out with the old and in with the new

After our flatmate walked out on us last week, my remaining flatmate and I have been on the hunt for a replacement in the form of a kitten.

Meet the newest addition to our home:

This little monster was bought from the SPCA. We chose between him and one other kitten, a teeny tiny black one that was very friendly and very playful. But this little ginger guy seemed nice in a subtle way.

We hummed and hah’ed (how on earth do you spell that??) over names for awhile. Here’s a list of the potential choices:

1. Squeak

2. Harold

3. Basil

4. Monty

But in the end we settled on Rocky.

If we’re being formal, Captain Rocky the Adventure Cat.

Overenthusiastic felines

My flatmate and I have been kitten hunting at the SPCA, and as you can see, some of the kittens tried to cop a feel. 

I don’t know what it is, but whenever Sacha cuddles the kittens they lie docilely in her arms, like sweet, little balls of fluff that exist for the sole purpose of looking cute and being snuggled. When I hold them though, they seem to think it’s playtime.

Sacha and I each picked up a kitten, and the one I was holding went absolutely nuts; smooching my face, wrapping its paws around my neck, climbing up onto my shoulder so it could wiggle underneath my hair. Sacha’s kitten just lay there looking cute. Moments after she passed it to me, however, it, too, went crazy. Like its predecessor, it managed to shimmy its way up my chest, onto my shoulder, and underneath my hair. 

The result was a number of scratches dotting my chest and around the back of my scalp. One thing’s for sure, those kittens seemed to be having a hell of time.

Peeping

 I’m staying at somebody’s house for the night, and I felt someone watching me. You should have seen the look on the air freshener’s face when I caught him in the act.

Sleazy critters that watch you pee

I noticed, while casually observing the toilet wall, that there’s this patch of uneven paint that resembles a happy hedgehog. But not a wholesomely happy hedgehog. The hedgehog looks like he’s happy because he just looked through his neighbour’s window and saw the lady-hedgehog next door naked.

In fact, forget I said happy hedgehog. He looks like a sleazy hedgehog. And now that I’ve figured that out I’m really not comfortable with him being on our toilet wall.

See if you can make him out:

Cannot unsee.

 

A furry ball of doom

I have just discovered what may possibly be the coolest breed of dog on the face of the Earth. Man, I don’t even know if they really are dogs. They might just be bears masquerading as dogs.

Ladies and gentlemen, I present to  you, the Tibetan Mastiff. 

Look at him! He doesn’t know what he is! Is he a gigantic lion bear dog? Is he a black and tan coloured cloud? We may never know. Just……just look at them.

 Can you imagine that behemoth running at you? It’d probably just be hanging its tongue out of its open mouth, happily prancing along, enjoying the day, but all you see is seven million kilos of death closing in on you with bared teeth. It has a mane for goodness sake!  Good lord.

Let’s not even get started on cleaning up after this one.

In all seriousness, I wonder what this dog’s nature is like. What if it was actually really lovely and wonderful with kids? Your children could ride it to school and be playground royalty because ain’t nobody gonna mess with them when they own that beast.

Which makes me wonder what it would be like taking it for a walk. Bathing it. Going for a trip to vet.

All in all, I think this is a highly inconvenient choice of pet.

But still…..puppies.